The Hard Life Of A Strong Woman---by Bryan F.

Minnie's cover photo because it was one of her favorite things.

Minnie McCrea was born in Seneca, Missouri in 1897. She was my paternal Grandmother. My sibling and I initially referred to her as Grandma Bennett until about 1966 or so, when she became Grandma Smith because of a new marriage.

Minnie Smith in 1965 or 66, age about 68. Thanksgiving at a large family gathering at her son Roy Overby's house in San Bernardino on La Hacienda St. The only Thanksgiving I ever spent with my Dad's family. 

She was a large but not tall woman with a strong will. We liked her best for her cooking which was fattening and delicious. But first a little background of this woman of great strength. 

Born and raised in Missouri in the southwestern part of the state on the edge of the Ozark Mountains. She married a man by the name of Overby. I do not know his first name and you will soon understand why I know very little about this man her first husband. Also, I apologize that pictures for my Dad’s side of the family are few and most are unavailable to me. 

So, Minnie marries and bears four children for My Overby, all born in the 1920’s. Three would survive, the youngest perished in a house fire as an infant. Now I’m very sketchy on timelines here as what follows was not really dinner table conversation especially as a young child which is when I absorbed the few memories of her early years I have to share. 

Apparently, there was a male neighbor that was accused of raping someone and Mr, Overby was for some reason highly incensed about this event and eventually killed the man with a shotgun in the man's own barn. There are vicious rumors that the man might have been engaged in some highly inappropriate behavior when Mr. Overby came upon him that day. 

There was obviously no defense for Mr. Overby, as this was clearly revenge or outrage rather than self-defense. My Overby went to jail and my Grandmother Minnie divorced him because as she put it “once a man was in prison he was no good anymore”, or something to that effect. 

Minnie would meet after this event a man on a bus bench in Joplin, Missouri by the name of Jasper Newton Franks. They hit it off and were married. She sold the farm and they moved to California where I believe some of Mr. Franks’ adult children from his first marriage lived in the Los Angeles and Riverside areas.  

Minnie and Jasper settled first in Colton California, famous for being the home of some of the Earp Brothers of western legend. My Dad was born there in 1932 and Minnie and Jasper soon moved to neighboring Highland, California. 

Soon my uncles would be born, twins named Claude and Leonard, completing Jasper's second family.

Jasper was born in June of 1871, so he was twenty-six years older than my Grandmother, about age fifty-nine when they married. The date of their marriage is an educated guess, but may have been as late as 1931. My father was born in late November 1932.

Apparently, life with Jasper Franks wasn’t so great. The stories go that he was a notoriously mean person. This is evidenced by my Grandmother's recounting of his absences during the marriage lasting sometimes for months and with no money left for her, for food or rent. My Grandmother, again earning the title I have given her story, rose up to the circumstances and worked, washing and ironing laundry by hand to keep herself and her six children alive. She was a former farmer and able to grow food in the backyard as well. She talked of harvesting wild Polk, a poisonous green from the backyard or any field she came upon to process into an edible supper for her children. You had to boil it twice or you would die. Think of the old song Polk Salad Annie.

Link to the sonk "Polk Salad Annie"

I believe that my Grandmother’s strong unwavering faith in her protestant God kept her mind from breaking while enduring so much. Death of a child, a murderer husband, moving cross country, unwittingly choosing the meanest guy ever to be your children’s provider and of course the story was not over, and she kept on keeping on. 

Little more needs be said about Jasper Newton Franks. He died November 7, 1952, at age 81. 

With all but the twins out of the house by then, they were seniors in high school, Minnie was mostly unburdened but still needed a partner to make ends meet. That usually meant putting the word out at church that a fine woman and a good cook was available for marriage. The bachelors would respond more to the cooking than any other benefit, as I’ve been told. 

Minnie and George Bennett visiting their soon to be in-laws, the Hays' at their home on Ninth St in Highland California. The date should be sometime in 1953 before my parent's wedding in July.

She met George Bennett shortly after Jasper's death through church and married him. He was a fine and generous man with his own house to share. I guess they maybe had four or five years together during which time his fine house burned to the ground uninsured. Well, there went any security once Mr. Bennett passed in 1957 when I was just two, almost three years old. So there is where the name Grandma Bennett came from, her third and best husband. She would remain Grandma Bennett until about 1965 or 66. She did marry in-between that time, but the marriage was annulled by her on grounds that I’m not privy to, but any mention of Mr Henry’s name brought a swift scowl to her face. The mind does wander, but best not to dwell. 

She would then make her final poor choice, likely out of desperation. Remember senior support programs were not what they are now and she was likely very vulnerable. But anyway, she marries Mr. Smith, I think his first name was Wilber. The story goes that he was abusive both mentally and physically. Well, the now, Grandma Smith, at least to me and my sibs was not having it. I remember all of us, my Mom, Dad, and siblings all going over to her house on Temple Street in Highland one afternoon after she had physically taken him by the collar and her foot in his ass, shoved him down the back stairs and told him to stay out, he was smaller than her. I remember how upset she was, but also relieved, as she told the story to my parents. 

Ironically, she kept the name. I think she was by then too tired to deal with the cost and effort to change it. She died bearing the name Minnie S. Smith. Her Liz Tayler name would have been: Minnie McCrea Overby Franks Bennet Henry Smith. She had nothing to be ashamed of. She just survived the best she could in a world that didn’t like or support women very much.

I still have my Grandma Smith's telephone. It brought her countless hours of comfort. It also prompted me to write this story.

Most of my personal memories of her were after Mr. Bennet. She was a widow most of that time sans the short marriage to Smith. She was a great cook and really enjoyed eating. Eating was one of her few pleasures that also included long phone conversations with her church lady friends when they would pray together for those in need or suffering in the church. She also loved her huge succulent plant collection. Succulents were big in the 60’s and not expensive at all like they are now. They are my favorite plant, I think because she let me help her care for them and because they are so beautiful in their structure. 

She always used Bisquick.

My mom and Dad would hit her up to sit with us kids both at her house and ours on various occasions. She was a good sitter and sometimes she would make us pancakes, or I think she called them flapjacks. If she was out of syrup, which she usually was we would get coffee syrup. A Great Depression Era and WW2 rations trick where she would heat coffee and sugar in a pan and then pour the thin confection over our flapjacks. It was fantastic and way better than the Cheerios that was our usual breakfast at home. She also made Bisquick biscuits that I loved to snack on while watching her Soaps with her. 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l11YqCXoeJw
(Link for General Hospital Intros since 1963.)

She would also watch her stories on TV and General Hospital was her favorite. She would get on the phone with her church lady friend and start crying about what happened to poor Jessie that day. We loved watching them with her, my brother Chuck still watches GH to this day. 

She had the coolest TV. The channel dial was a circle with long plastic pegs. You would press the peg next to say, channel 11 and the circle dial would advance while the channels whizzed by until it arrived on channel 11. It was cool, but the plastic pegs were kinda sharp on young tender fingers. My Grandma did not complain, her fingers were tough, well those she had left. Three had been chopped off when she was very young while attempting to hold the wood for her brother to chop. I always got the impression that she thought it might not have exactly been an accident.

Minnie with Her daughter Wilma Overby Dennis and her son Claude, I think, could be Leonard, lol. I think it's Claude. probably the late 1960s.

A strong woman she was and deserves to be remembered.

In her later years the early to mid-1970s I believe she had moved in with her daughter Wilma by this point.
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